Have recently started to read a book. It’s the autobiography of famous Swedish author and criminologist Leif G W Persson. The thing I find interesting about the book so far is the way the author describes his personality. The feeling of being a spectator, of being an observer of things from a distance and keeping to himself rather than be in the middle of things. Also the need to be alone in one’s own mind and the desire to read books, all kinds of books. The desire to know and to learn. I can recognize myself in this description. It’s how I’ve lived my life, or most of it. Always had a desire to observe and always felt a bit detached from the life around me, even when being among friends and while playing games or being in school.
Not always how I wanted it to be, and not always good, but it’s the way I’ve been and the way I am. I guess what I like about reading Persson’s description of himself is that I don’t have to feel like I’m the only one to have this outlook on life and this way of being. Of course I’ve known a long time I’m not alone but I still like to be reminded of it. Sometimes I still feel alone in being the way I am anyway.