Yesterday I started to write two blog posts. The first one I didn’t finish because it became too depressing to write and read it. The second one I didn’t finish too because it became too depressing to read and write. I decided not to post anything at all.
My problem is that it seems I always end up writing about problems. No matter what the subject matter might be when I start. Always ends the same way. My misery, my problems, my shortcomings, my failures and my worries – over and over. It annoys me I can’t seem to be able to write something else.
Sometimes I am able. Sometimes I’m happy and able to share with the world how happy I am. It doesn’t last, though. Misery seems to last a long time. It seems to always be around or lurking the dark shadows of my mind. Always ready to jump up and show its ugly face. I guess I’m no better than that even when I hope and wish to be.
I hate it.