Type headline here

Hello there, have you missed me?

Not yet? Ok, I’ll go away a bit longer next time and see if that helps. Now I’m back and as usual I have no idea what to type here so I will make it up as I go. Most of the time that means the post will be a ramble and end without any warning. So, with all that out of the way – what shall we talk about?

Did anything happen today worth mentioning?  Two things I can think of right away.

1) I masturbated before brushing my teeth this morning. I did have clothes on though. Actually it was yesterday morning as I’m typing this past midnight on Friday evening or rather Saturday morning. For you Americans it will still be Friday for a few hours so don’t worry about it unless you’ll be reading this tomorrow when it will be Saturday for you lot too.

2) Can’t remember. Wait, now I remember. I had to use public transportation today to get to and from the office. In the morning it wasn’t so bad but in the afternoon it was a piece of living hell. Warm, humid, crowded and sweaty. On top of that the teen slacker generation.

I heard them talking on the bus while on the way home. One guy was proud of not having studied for a test at school so he could leave early and have the day off. Instead of being in school he had been skateboarding. Another guy was talking about how he spent his allowance in three days and then told his parents his account was empty. What the parents did? Gave him more money. The third guy was happy to have switched schools because at the new school he had gotten a MacBook that he would get to buy later at a low cost. His friend at another school had “only” gotten an iPad. I was thinking of all the tax money going to waste on these teenage students by providing them with fancy hardware at school when they don’t seem to bother learning anything.

Ok, enough grumpy old man for today.

At the office I wrote some texts or edited some I had written. My serious blog project over there is making progress but my job search isn’t. However, soon it will be summer and the job market will be a bit slow so I don’t expect any miracles. All I do is keep trying.

Had a very healthy fish dinner but proceeded to spoil that by eating Pringles chips and sour cream dip. Then I had a few cookies and some juice. All of this while watching ice hockey on TV.  Sweden lost a very violent game against Russia.

For those of you who follow my tweets not much of the information in this post is new, but you can’t expect me to create exclusive content for all my channels. Or is that what you expect me to do?

Later in the evening I begun to watch Get The Gringo starring Mel Gibson, but soon stopped in order to write this instead. After this I might end up in a chat room somewhere.

Now I have reached the end. Not bad for not knowing what to type.

Peace.

Hell

Yesterday I made a field trip to hell.  Not sure what I’m on about? I’ll tell you.

I got on the bus. I travelled for a long time. Got off at the wrong stop, then walked around looking for the place where I was supposed to be for a long time before finding it only a short distance from the bus stop but across street and in the opposite direction.

By this time I was in pain from my stomach and could hardly walk the last few steps to the entrance of the building. When I got inside the door, I found an empty chair and sat down.

Now began what seemed like an endless time of waiting.  Waiting for a very short general information about the company that was recruiting new employees this day. Then  an even longer time of waiting began for my name to be called so that a short interview could take place. When that finally happened I was more than happy to leave the whole thing behind and travel back to the real world.

It did feel like a visit to hell because of two things:

1) the pain I was in for most of the time I was there

2) the lack of discipline among those attending and the unorganized method by which the meeting was executed.

However I could add this meeting/recruitment/interview to my list of job applications made this month. Perhaps I will have some luck with this one in the end.

Friday, March 30, 2012

Hi there,

time to update. Most of you know how much of my blog is devoted to looking back on my life and how much of the rest is devoted to whining about how much of a fail I am and how little I value myself despite having people around who actually think I’m good enough to be around.

I’ve decided to stop doing all these pointless updates about those things that I can’t change. I want to change my outlook.

How has this week been then?  Slow and just like most weeks. Haven’t done anything special and haven’t got much to tell.

Still bothered by pain that comes and goes but I think it’s getting better even if its not easy to tell.

The weather is worse than last week. Very cold and lots of rain and even some snow coming along. Guess it’s the last stand of Winter.

I’ve mostly watched movies and listened to music this week except for time spent at the office and on job searching. Not been much of a social magnet but I think that will change.

Peace.

Friday, March 23, 2012

I think the last update could be misunderstood. I wrote it as a statement of my ongoing confusion about what to do with my life and my “career”. That’s why I mentioned having read about someone I used to work with many years ago.  When I read what I wrote it comes across as some kind of jealous criticism but in reality I was trying to express how I wish I had such a clear idea of what I want to do as that person seems to have. Anyway, I usually don’t apologize for writing strange updates so I will not start now.

This Friday is sunny and warm and soon I’ll be on my way home for the weekend. So all is well that ends well.

Peace.

Sometimes

Sometimes it’s good to stop and not rush in like a fool. I was about to update this sooner but I’m glad I didn’t. That text would not have been clever if it had been written and published then. At that time I didn’t have all the facts and would have risked jumping to conclusions, the wrong conclusions. Now that the facts are in I am able to write something better.

Yesterday I didn’t do much of anything. I had been awake almost to 6am hoping to have a little fun in a chatroom but instead I spent the night waiting. Needless to say after that adventure I was tired because I slept only about 4 hours before getting up again.  Not much later my mother invited me to have dinner at the local pizza place so we went there in the early afternoon and had some pizza before going grocery shopping and then returning home.

The rest of the evening I spent watching the live broadcast of Whitney Houston’s funeral service online  and later I also watched the third qualifying competition of the Swedish Song Contest on public television.

Before going to sleep I looked around at chatrooms and took a quick look at Chatroulette. I also looked at my Tumblr dashboard. Feeling slightly bored and tired I fell asleep after midnight. Slept well and woke up around 6am then went back to sleep for another 3 hours.

Got up and got dressed at around 9:30am.  Checked Twitter and read some posts. Went out and removed some snow, got the morning paper and returned inside to read it. Got a call from my uncle asking if I would like to go to the theater. I didn’t really feel like it but eventually I said I would go. He had a ticket left over due to another person’s illness and didn’t want it to go to waste.

The play was a production of  Noel Coward‘s Brief Encounter where the live action on stage was integrated with filmed sequences shown on a screen above the stage. It was an entertaining show but I can’t say it was the best I’ve ever seen. At one point I even started to fall asleep which was odd since the play is only about 90 minutes long.

I went to buy some groceries on the way home and got back just as it started to snow. Had dinner and then went to check out the latest news from the online world.

Soon I will have a shower and then I have a few more hours to kill before going to sleep again.  Another weekend over and done.

Peace.

 

Among the living

Hi,

This be me, your blogger.  Me is back to haunt your eyes with random typed text and in worst case struggle your mind to dwell on the meaning of said scribble.

Weekend it was recently. Noticed I did. Fast it passed. Do what, I did? Froze my unused balls off along with my heavy ass. So, now I broke the mold – that kind of language uncalled for. Me should be ashamed of me, but me is not.

Why me froze? Car broke down.

Had to spend many hours outdoors in cold weather. Try to jump start the car. No luck. Try to tow it. Only a short distance. In the end nothing else to do but have tow truck come and pick the car up and take it to a garage. Most of my Saturday spent waiting for said tow truck to arrive at location of car. Very cold for poor old me. Glad when it was over and done.

Sunday spent recovering.

Now it’s Monday. Your blogger is trying to be productive. Not much of such though.

Peace.

Look forward

I’m back!

Done some more thinking and decided it’s better to look at the future and live in the present than keep looking back and wish things would have been different.

At the place I am now, I’m actually rather happy with most things. My life is not the best but some parts of it are good. So I will keep my focus on the here and now and continue the struggle to move forward.

It’s a very cold day, or at least the morning was. At the office I have so far managed to get some things done and somehow feel a new surge of energy where recently there was none to be found.

I know who to thank for this. There’s one person who makes me find the will to go on even when I don’t know why I should. It’s not easy to explain how it happens but it does. That’s good enough for me.

Looking forward to the weekend and hope this freezing cold weather will go away eventually.

Peace.

Things happen

Some time ago I got an email from an old online friend I hadn’t heard from in a long time. I was happy for some news, even though the news wasn’t only good. Most of all I was happy the communication wasn’t terminated and that the friendship had not reached an end. Still, not long before this happened I had made my peace with the fact that the friendship had reached its end and that it was time to let it become a fine memory and move on. Now, after having the latest news, I feel somewhat conflicted. I don’t know when or if there’ll be any more news but I can’t rule it out. I just don’t know how I feel about bringing this friendship back to life. As much as I want it to continue I can’t deny that I also have made my peace with it being over and keeping it alive just for keeping it alive does not really appeal to me that much. However, I will see what will happen and keep the door open to whatever will be.

What I did

Image via Wikipedia

Friday. I was glad to get out of the office and on my way home before the worst of the rain and bad weather hit. Had some bad luck with the buses but at last I was at home. Had a homemade hamburger for dinner and later in the evening enjoyed a nice slice of pizza. Also had some other items lined up for late night snacks. Some bread, Italian salami and mozzarella cheese and a big bottle of Dr Pepper.

However late in the evening I watched a movie  - The Whistleblower – that nearly made me sick. Don’t get me wrong, it was a very good movie about a very serious and real subject – human trafficking – but some scenes made me almost sick with sadness and horror. The cruelty and violence the victims of trafficking – women and young girls –  suffer in this movie at the hands of the men who buy, sell and use them as slaves made me feel ashamed of being a man even though I would never be able to be a part of anything like that.

Surprisingly I managed to sleep when I went to sleep and I woke up rested on Saturday morning.

After breakfast and reading the paper I didn’t do very much. Looked at Twitter and Tumblr, listened to music and spent some time daydreaming. Had some grilled salmon and fried sliced potatoes for dinner.  Some pain from kidney stones made me go to bed for an hour.

Later, in the evening, I went  by bus and train to do some grocery shopping.

Spent the rest of the evening watching a movie - Sahara -  with James Belushi as the main character.  It was a war movie but it felt more like a western. Entertaining and thrilling.

Slept well  and long and woke up after eleven on Sunday morning. Got up and read all of  the morning paper at breakfast. Had a ham sandwich for breakfast.

Then a bit later I went out to test if the car would start as it hadn’t been started for a long time. It started on the first try.

After reblogging and looking at my Tumblr dashboard I decided to write something for my blog and this is it. I admit it’s not much news or very interesting but at least it’s another update.

The rest of this Sunday afternoon and evening I will probably spend the same way as most Sunday evenings. Reading, listening to music and/or watching a movie.  Will have a shower and maybe wash my hair too. Haven’t decided yet.

Tomorrow is a new day at the office. New supervisors starting. Will be interesting. Sort of.

Peace.

This is Tuesday

Tuesday speaking. Just had a word from Monday, said it won’t be around until next week. So, I guess you are stuck with little old me. I know, it sucks but life can’t only be Fridays or Saturdays or whatever your preference might be. There has to be some room for Tuesdays too. Now, I know, we don’t amount to a hell of a lot. Mostly you just pass through us on your way to the greener pastures of Friday and Saturday but hey, here’s a secret, they’re just days of the week too, believe it or not they’re just the same as me and my buddy Monday. However most of you don’t seem to notice us and when you do you want to forget us. Or get rid of us. Even Wednesday and Thursday are more popular. They almost get to hang with the cool kids so they usually don’t want us to tag along. Being a Tuesday is no piece of cake. Sometimes I wish I was a Friday too or that Friday was a Tuesday so that I would get to be cool instead. I know jealousy is not very attractive so I try not to think about how much I’d like to be Friday, instead I focus on the fact that without me Monday would be very lonely just like poor Sunday who’s all alone at the end of the week. Not cool enough to hang with Saturday and Friday and not dull enough to be seen with losers like me and Monday. It must suck to be Sunday too. At least it must be a bit lonely to always be the day when everyone’s resting up after two wild nights of partying and mayhem.

Now before I start to sound all negative, I’ll sign off.

Peace.