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All posts for the month September, 2010

Another day, another lesson learned

Published 09/30/2010 by MoonieZ

Yes I’m back again. It’s about 1 am and I was going to get some sleep but then this thing called reality had a way of twisting itself in some unexpected turns and suddenly I got to rethink all of my past 10 days of thinking and feeling and reacting and acting and everything else I’ve done. Suddenly I think I’ve been a bit too dramatic but on the other hand I’ve learned again that age-old lesson that a lack of accurate information and the lack of any information at all is the main cause of misunderstandings and jumping to wrong conclusions. So I have to be very humble and forgive myself and the world around me for letting myself get carried away at times. On the other hand I am not trying to apologize for being human and having feelings. I see no reason to excuse myself for being able to care about people and about what happens around me. I am sorry though that I have misunderstood some things and probably been a bit too dramatic in some of my posts and tweets but hey even the Romans knew that to fail is to be human. Anyway, I am sincerely sorry if I’ve offended or stepped on any toes or whatever else I have to be sorry for. Now I’ll return to my usual calm state of mind and pick up where I left off before. Take care. Be well. Have a good day. A good night and sweet dreams. Life goes on – long after the thrill of living is gone. Sorry, I’m getting sidetracked again. So I better stop before I make a fool of myself again. Too late ? Ok  - I’ll survive.

“Human Touch”

Published 09/29/2010 by MoonieZ

Bruce Springsteen – Human Touch

Another one of  my favorite songs. I’m glad to find the video on YouTube because I like the video as much as I like the song. Sometimes I long for a little human touch too… Tonight would be fine but I have a feeling it ain’t gonna happen. I know. I know. I gotta make it happen. Easy to say…

Another Tuesday

Published 09/28/2010 by MoonieZ

Yep, it’s Tuesday. Nothing much to add to that. I woke up early because I had to, and because I couldn’t sleep. Had to go to the bathroom. And then I thought what a shame to be alone on a morning when not being alone would have been so much nicer. Anyway after that thought I drifted off to sleep for a few minutes until my alarm decided to wake me up again. My alarm is my cell phone playing Bruce Springsteen‘s Radio Nowhere louder and louder until I shut it down. Getting up again, finding it cold to get out of bed, I got some more clothes on and went to the kitchen to fix a sandwich and a glass of water. Yes – that’s my regular breakfast. I know I should eat a more healthy breakfast but I just can’t eat much when I wake up. That’s it. Ok, I got myself dressed, brushed my teeth and urinated before grabbing my bag and heading out to the car. Borrowed car. Have no money to own a car at this point so I’m lucky to be able to borrow one from time to time. Got started and drove to the unemployment agency meeting I had scheduled to attend. It was the usual stuff nothing new and it was not a long meeting. Got a letter that I had to mail so I did that on the way back, bought some food and drink and returned home to read job ads and do some writing and other stuff. Later I checked email, read the night’s tweets and looked at my Facebook status. Logged on to MFC to check some chatrooms. Had some dinner. Checked more cams. Read Twitter tweets. Updated old blog posts  and added links to some. Sometimes I’m amazed how many posts I’ve written and how much stuff I’ve written about over the years. Still there are many months when I only posted once or not at all and a few where I posted more than once a day . I know that the frequent posting occurs when I’m feeling good about life and when I’m happy and thinking that things will be good. When I’ve made new friends and when I’ve started to like someone too much. When I’ve started to care. Usually this don’t last too long even though I always wish it would. So anyway this was my Tuesday in September 2010. In fact the last Tuesday of this month. I hope yours was better.

Remember

Published 09/26/2010 by MoonieZ

Sitting here. Saturday night. I’m all alone as usual. Sitting here. Thinking. Listening to music. Thinking back on the glory days. When I was still young. Where did all the time go ? Once  I thought I had all the time in the world to do what I wanted to do. Then I thought I had time to find out what I wanted to do. Now that time is all used up and I still don’t know what I want to do. So much wasted time. Listening to Dire Straits thinking back on the girl at school who introduced the music of Dire Straits to me almost 25 years ago. If it hadn’t been for her I probably would never have started to listen. If not for her I would never have found out how much I like John Mellencamp‘s music. Sometimes I wonder if she ever returned from that trip around the world she embarked on a long time ago. Haven’t heard from her since then. Last news was a postcard from Bali or someplace around there. Anyway I’ve already told the story on this blog about how she managed to break my heart – or rather how I managed to break my then young fragile heart over her. Foolish I was to break my heart over somebody who never loved me and never ever would, no matter how much I wanted it to happen. Well sometimes listening to music brings back a lot of memories of the past. I don’t know why I always return to my past. Maybe because I think the future hasn’t got much to offer ? Maybe because  I think my best days are all behind me ? Well I hope there are some good days still left in front of me but I can’t deny I doubt it lately. The way my life is going I don’t know if it even deserves to be called a life. At least its not living, its just staying alive. Still I keep on hoping there’ll be something good coming my way yet. If I just hold on one more day things will change. Right ?  So why did I start writing this ? Oh I was listening to some old tunes and started to remember my glory days. The sky was the limit. Everything was possible. How I long for those good old days now ! To be back in the high life again…. Keep dreaming.

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